Your Life: The Soundtrack
Opening credits:	Beautiful Somehow ~ Joy Williams
Waking up:	California ~ Hawk Nelson
Average day:	Legacy ~ Nichole Nordeman
First date:	The Way You Look Tonight ~ Michael Buble
Falling in love:	Tale as Old as Time ~ Beauty and the Beast
Love scene:	I’m in Love with You ~ Joy Williams
Fight scene:	Your So Vain ~ Carly Simon (ha, that is the first thing that popped into my head.)
Breaking up:	How Can You Mend A Broken Heart ~ Bee Gees
Getting back together:	Return to Me ~ Dean Martin
Secret love:	Goodnight my Sweet Someone ~ The Music Man Soundtrack
Life’s okay:	Panio Man ~ Billy Joel
Mental breakdown:	Bohemian Rhapsody ~ Queen
Driving:	Margaritaville ~ Jimmy Buffet or Mr. HeatMiser ~ Big Bad Voo Doo Daddy
Learning a lesson:	Through Heaven’s Eyes ~ Brian Stokes Mitchell
Deep thought:	Breathe (2AM) Anna Nalick
Flashback:	I’ll Be Home For Christmas ~ Michael Buble
Partying:	Lady Marmalade ~ (Hah, just kidding, I only like the begining of the song, it has a peppy beat.)
Happy dance:	Sway ~ Michael Buble
Regreting:	Who Am I ~ Casting Crowns
Long night alone:	All I Need ~ Bethany Dillon
Death scene:	Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door ~ Avalon (hah) or Past the Point of No Return ~ Phantom of the Opera (haha)
Closing credits:	Everything to Me ~ Avalon

Today my mother and I trekked up to the city to see two very dear friends join together and become one. We have waited so long to see this day come, many years we have been praying for this day to come and today it came. We celebrated joyfully with many friends and loved ones.
I also got to see many of my friends, including the best friend. We jumped at the chance for a photoshoot and the results were hysterical.
During this I realized how much we had changed. We have changed both for the better, and we were so different than what we used to be. We both are heading different directions, I going off to college soon, and she involved in basketball, driving, and many other things in high school.


But when we still get together, no matter how different our circumstances are at that time; it feels like we picked up right where we left off. I had forgotten how much fun I have with her. She sees me for who I am, and loves me for it.
I truly love my life here, where I am, but I am so glad that I have her in my life as well. She makes things a little brighter.
I love her a lot.

As for the wedding, it was wonderful. The bride was beautiful, the groom looked spiffy, and our friend look mighty handsome in his tux. It was small and quaint; just a few close friends and many tears. I will flickr some pictures of the wedding, because it was so beautiful.
On the ride home I got to have a much desired conversation with my mother. We talked of my future, some decisions I would be making, my major in college, and careers I would be looking into. My favorite part of the trip was a short conversation we had, it occurred something like this:

Her: You forgot to remind me to get gas back in our old neighborhood before we left for home.

Me: I am sorry, I forgot.

Her: We are almost out of gas, we won't make it much longer.

Me: There is a gas station up the road.

Her: Great, we are going to have to get gas in the ghetto.

I love my mother. She makes me laugh. :-)

Looking back I thought my New Year's Eve would be pretty stinky, but it turned out to be a wonderful thing. It twas a great was a great way to end the year and bring in the new one. Happy New Year. :-)

Your Life: The Soundtrack
Opening credits:	Beautiful Somehow ~ Joy Williams
Waking up:	California ~ Hawk Nelson
Average day:	Legacy ~ Nichole Nordeman
First date:	The Way You Look Tonight ~ Michael Buble
Falling in love:	Tale as Old as Time ~ Beauty and the Beast
Love scene:	I'm in Love with You ~ Joy Williams
Fight scene:	Your So Vain ~ Carly Simon (ha, that is the first thing that popped into my head.)
Breaking up:	How Can You Mend A Broken Heart ~ Bee Gees
Getting back together:	Return to Me ~ Dean Martin
Secret love:	Goodnight my Sweet Someone ~ The Music Man Soundtrack
Life's okay:	Panio Man ~ Billy Joel
Mental breakdown:	Bohemian Rhapsody ~ Queen
Driving:	Margaritaville ~ Jimmy Buffet or Mr. HeatMiser ~ Big Bad Voo Doo Daddy
Learning a lesson:	Through Heaven's Eyes ~ Brian Stokes Mitchell
Deep thought:	Breathe (2AM) Anna Nalick
Flashback:	I'll Be Home For Christmas ~ Michael Buble
Partying:	Lady Marmalade ~ (Hah, just kidding, I only like the begining of the song, it has a peppy beat.)
Happy dance:	Sway ~ Michael Buble
Regreting:	Who Am I ~ Casting Crowns
Long night alone:	All I Need ~ Bethany Dillon
Death scene:	Knockin' On Heaven's Door ~ Avalon (hah) or Past the Point of No Return ~ Phantom of the Opera (haha)
Closing credits:	Everything to Me ~ Avalon
Take this survey Find more surveys Happy New Year.

“The Singing Butler”

This is probably one of my favorite prints that I have seen in a long time. If I had money, I would purchase it in a heartbeat.

Lately I have felt stuck in life. There is so much that I want to do, I am ready to move on. Opportunities are heading my way, and soon. But right now they feel so far away, just out of my grasp. These feelings seem to cause me to become apathetic about the schoolwork that I have now, and the responsibilities I have right now. This has only come on these past few months and I have no idea what is wrong with me. The past three years on school I have stayed verily motivated.

I applied to a different college today, one that I can still go to and stay at home, I hope I make it in.

Maybe sleep will help me figure out what is wrong with me.

"The Singing Butler"

This is probably one of my favorite prints that I have seen in a long time. If I had money, I would purchase it in a heartbeat.

Lately I have felt stuck in life. There is so much that I want to do, I am ready to move on. Opportunities are heading my way, and soon. But right now they feel so far away, just out of my grasp. These feelings seem to cause me to become apathetic about the schoolwork that I have now, and the responsibilities I have right now. This has only come on these past few months and I have no idea what is wrong with me. The past three years on school I have stayed verily motivated.

I applied to a different college today, one that I can still go to and stay at home, I hope I make it in.

Maybe sleep will help me figure out what is wrong with me.

My Firsts For 2005

JANURARY!

First Time for my Dad to lose his job.

First time to have an ipod.

First time to drive to church in the snow.

First time to drive in “Mr. Darcy”

FEBRUARY!

First time to receive an award.

First time to be “spies” in the park.

First time to be chased by a dog.

First time to receive flowers from my father for no reason.

MARCH!

First F in an class. Boo.

First time to wear bunny ears while walking in target.

First time to cry over the loss of a friend.

APRIL!

First time to receive flowers from a boy.

First time to have my tonsils taken out.

First time to discover The Phantom of the Opera.

First time to make earrings.

MAY!

First Prom.

First time to smell pot.

First time to shop for a dress.

First time to be yelled at by a doctor.

First move.

JUNE!

First incredible reconciliation.

First time living in a new town.

First time to be homesick.

First time to meet Raychell.

First time to unpack my room.

JULY!

First time to go to a Hawk Nelson Concert.

First time to wear pink converse.

First time to own a Beatles shirt.

First time to apply for a job.

AUGUST!

First time to go to a fish fry.

First time to ride a horse.

First time to discover Billy Joel.

SEPTEMBER!

First time to be seventeen.

First time to shop in Sherman.

First time to show sheep at a show.
First time to yell at a goat.

OCTOBER!

First time to dress up as a mouse for Halloween.

First time to perform in Speechless.

First trip to St. Louis.

First time to drive to the city.

NOVEMBER!

First Thanksgiving in a new town.

First late night at Braums.

First SS Class Party.

First time to be scared so badly that I wet my pants.

First time to drive of a bridge.

First time to apply for college.

DECEMBER!

First walk in the snow.

First time having a serious talk with a boy in a truck.

(Not a lot of things happened in December, work with me.)

First time to drive my new car “Willoughby”.

First snowball fight.

First time to cry out to God on my knees.

First time to color my hair “mocha frappachino”.

There was my firsts for 2005! 2006 is going to hold a lot of firsts as well. First time out of the country, college, first passport, and hopefully a whole lot more!!

~
has been one of those days….
It wasn’t the greatest Christmas.
Church was canceled tonight.
My car overheated.
I was by myself.
My father had to walk me through over the phone on how to pour water in the radiator.
I got locked out of my house too.
And to top it all off, I got ketchup on my jeans.
Let’s hope the last week of the year goes a little better.
I will summarize my Christmas in a quote that came from my aunt this weekend:
Come here! What are you wearing that smells like pot?

Take that as you will.

My Firsts For 2005

JANURARY!

First Time for my Dad to lose his job.

First time to have an ipod.

First time to drive to church in the snow.

First time to drive in "Mr. Darcy"

FEBRUARY!

First time to receive an award.

First time to be "spies" in the park.

First time to be chased by a dog.

First time to receive flowers from my father for no reason.

MARCH!

First F in an class. Boo.

First time to wear bunny ears while walking in target.

First time to cry over the loss of a friend.

APRIL!

First time to receive flowers from a boy.

First time to have my tonsils taken out.

First time to discover The Phantom of the Opera.

First time to make earrings.

MAY!

First Prom.

First time to smell pot. :-)

First time to shop for a dress.

First time to be yelled at by a doctor.

First move.

JUNE!

First incredible reconciliation.

First time living in a new town.

First time to be homesick.

First time to meet Raychell. :-)

First time to unpack my room.

JULY!

First time to go to a Hawk Nelson Concert.

First time to wear pink converse.

First time to own a Beatles shirt.

First time to apply for a job.

AUGUST!

First time to go to a fish fry.

First time to ride a horse.

First time to discover Billy Joel.

SEPTEMBER!

First time to be seventeen.

First time to shop in Sherman.

First time to show sheep at a show.
First time to yell at a goat.

OCTOBER!

First time to dress up as a mouse for Halloween.

First time to perform in Speechless.

First trip to St. Louis.

First time to drive to the city.

NOVEMBER!

First Thanksgiving in a new town.

First late night at Braums.

First SS Class Party.

First time to be scared so badly that I wet my pants.

First time to drive of a bridge.

First time to apply for college.

DECEMBER!

First walk in the snow.

First time having a serious talk with a boy in a truck.

(Not a lot of things happened in December, work with me.)

First time to drive my new car "Willoughby".

First snowball fight.

First time to cry out to God on my knees.

First time to color my hair "mocha frappachino".

There was my firsts for 2005! 2006 is going to hold a lot of firsts as well. First time out of the country, college, first passport, and hopefully a whole lot more!!

~

has been one of those days....

It wasn't the greatest Christmas.
Church was canceled tonight.
My car overheated.
I was by myself.
My father had to walk me through over the phone on how to pour water in the radiator.
I got locked out of my house too.
And to top it all off, I got ketchup on my jeans.
Let's hope the last week of the year goes a little better.

I will summarize my Christmas in a quote that came from my aunt this weekend:

Come here! What are you wearing that smells like pot?

Take that as you will.

Last Night….
Me: Your shirt makes you look like Kermit the Frog.
Him: Really? You are the first person to say that to me today.
Me: And didn’t it just make your day a little better?
~
I shall be spending the holidays with family up north on my mother’s side. Prayers are needed that I will come back without commiting an illegal act of violence. Gotta love family get togethers. Holidays bring out all the nuts in the family tree.
~
So until we meet again Merry Christmas.
Wow, that sounded corny.

Last Night....
Me: Your shirt makes you look like Kermit the Frog.
Him: Really? You are the first person to say that to me today.
Me: And didn't it just make your day a little better?

~

I shall be spending the holidays with family up north on my mother's side. Prayers are needed that I will come back without commiting an illegal act of violence. :-)
Gotta love family get togethers. Holidays bring out all the nuts in the family tree.

~

So until we meet again Merry Christmas.

Wow, that sounded corny. :-)

This weekend has been crazy. That is the only word to describe it.
Fell in love with this song, am playing it all the time, I believe my parents now think I have fallen and hit my head.
Reading This Present Darkness, which is turning out to be an excellent read.
Got a new itunes card. I cannot get enough of those.
*Cough* A Good Christmas Gift for Me. *Cough*
A trip to Sherman with friends.
King Kong gave me bad dreams.
Adrien Brody is pretty. I like him.
Dinner at Roma’s with friends Saturday night.
Talking in the cold with friends Sunday night.
When you leave, my colors fade to gray.
Love the American version.

I just finished a long set of pictures of flickr. I conned a best friend into being my model for the evening. It is a few pages long, but the pictures turned out great.

This weekend has been crazy. That is the only word to describe it.

Fell in love with this song, am playing it all the time, I believe my parents now think I have fallen and hit my head.

Reading This Present Darkness, which is turning out to be an excellent read.

Got a new itunes card. I cannot get enough of those.
*Cough* A Good Christmas Gift for Me. *Cough*

A trip to Sherman with friends.

King Kong gave me bad dreams.

Adrien Brody is pretty. I like him.

Dinner at Roma's with friends Saturday night.

Talking in the cold with friends Sunday night.



When you leave, my colors fade to gray.

Love the American version. :-)

I have a newfound respect for my cell phone. Yes, it has been dropped countless times on so many different surfaces that I have lost count. It has seen the world, well, at least America, and has become quite the traveler. My phone has sent over 500 text messages this summer, that have gotten me into some pretty interesting experiences. It has made some fun phone calls, and others that have broke my heart. My phone’s voicemail message now is decked out in Christmas with the message “Hey it’s Addi, and I am not ho ho home.” (yes corny, I know). But last night, my phone yet again went through a new trial all its own.
I dropped it in the toilet. So after 24 hours of my phone sputtering, vibrating, making obscene shieks at any random time, and me being afraid I would have to part with my phone forever; it made it through the night and is now working. There were times I thought it was seeing that light at the end of the tunnel, but alas, my phone is here to stay. I now do believe that we can go through anything together. So to celebrate, I am going into town today to buy my phone a spiffy new cover.

I have a newfound respect for my cell phone. Yes, it has been dropped countless times on so many different surfaces that I have lost count. It has seen the world, well, at least America, and has become quite the traveler. My phone has sent over 500 text messages this summer, that have gotten me into some pretty interesting experiences. It has made some fun phone calls, and others that have broke my heart. My phone's voicemail message now is decked out in Christmas with the message "Hey it's Addi, and I am not ho ho home." (yes corny, I know). But last night, my phone yet again went through a new trial all its own.
I dropped it in the toilet. So after 24 hours of my phone sputtering, vibrating, making obscene shieks at any random time, and me being afraid I would have to part with my phone forever; it made it through the night and is now working. There were times I thought it was seeing that light at the end of the tunnel, but alas, my phone is here to stay. I now do believe that we can go through anything together. So to celebrate, I am going into town today to buy my phone a spiffy new cover.

Learning can be a hard thing to do. It requires, patience, humility, humbleness, and a willing spirit.
If you told me a year ago that last night I would be sitting in a truck, with one of the most attractive people I have ever known, having to apologize for snapping at him; I would have laughed. This boy has a tendency to bring out the worst in me, and I hate that. The more I got to know him, the more I found him to be very proud and irritating. But he is human, like myself, and not perfect like I thought him out to be.
I was relying on a friend, who was in love him, for information concerning his character. To her, he was perfect, was she very wrong. All day I could not figure out why I was so disappointed that he had faults. Then this revelation came to me and everything began to become very clear.
Last night when he said those unkind things to me, the old me would have ran away and cried. But the person I was last night, I hardly recognized. He was rude, and I did not let him get away with it. I shot back, and told him how I felt. But saying how I felt and not backing down did not make me feel any better. It actually made me feel worse.
Part of me wants to write him off as a ‘little bug’ and end the friendship all together, but then there is another part, a small but significant one that makes me want to strive to make this friendship work, to not write him off and find a common ground. So many things are going through my head that I don’t know what to do or what to think. I normally don’t do this but I would like some solicited advice.
What are your thoughts?Whether I know you or not, emails are welcome.

Learning can be a hard thing to do. It requires, patience, humility, humbleness, and a willing spirit.
If you told me a year ago that last night I would be sitting in a truck, with one of the most attractive people I have ever known, having to apologize for snapping at him; I would have laughed. This boy has a tendency to bring out the worst in me, and I hate that. The more I got to know him, the more I found him to be very proud and irritating. But he is human, like myself, and not perfect like I thought him out to be.
I was relying on a friend, who was in love him, for information concerning his character. To her, he was perfect, was she very wrong. All day I could not figure out why I was so disappointed that he had faults. Then this revelation came to me and everything began to become very clear.
Last night when he said those unkind things to me, the old me would have ran away and cried. But the person I was last night, I hardly recognized. He was rude, and I did not let him get away with it. I shot back, and told him how I felt. But saying how I felt and not backing down did not make me feel any better. It actually made me feel worse.
Part of me wants to write him off as a 'little bug' and end the friendship all together, but then there is another part, a small but significant one that makes me want to strive to make this friendship work, to not write him off and find a common ground. So many things are going through my head that I don't know what to do or what to think. I normally don't do this but I would like some solicited advice.
What are your thoughts?Whether I know you or not, emails are welcome.
Talk To Me.

How refreshing to know You don’t need me
How amazing to find that You want me
Me: I just don’t think He is going to make it in life. I swear, I think He got dropped as a baby.
Dad: Well of course you think that. He is a guy, if we are not interested in you, then we barely notice. We are stupid, men are pigs, its a law of nature.
There you have it, life’s lessons from my father. He makes me smile.

How refreshing to know You don't need me
How amazing to find that You want me

Me: I just don't think He is going to make it in life. I swear, I think He got dropped as a baby.
Dad: Well of course you think that. He is a guy, if we are not interested in you, then we barely notice. We are stupid, men are pigs, its a law of nature.

There you have it, life's lessons from my father. He makes me smile.

This past two days I feel like I am “running a hundred miles an hour in the wrong direction”.
I hate to sound so dramatic but, I feel like my life is falling apart. I would explain it on here, but then I feel like I would be revealing myself, a part of me I want to remain private. Someone hurt me last night, a hurt that was one that was very similar to those in my past. All of these feelings are flooding back; pain, hurt, anger, regret, tears.
But this time it is going to be different, God is going to carry me through this, I know he will. I know I can go to him, and He has sent me wonderful council.
But the pain is still there, and it won’t go away for a while.

This past two days I feel like I am "running a hundred miles an hour in the wrong direction".

I hate to sound so dramatic but, I feel like my life is falling apart. I would explain it on here, but then I feel like I would be revealing myself, a part of me I want to remain private. Someone hurt me last night, a hurt that was one that was very similar to those in my past. All of these feelings are flooding back; pain, hurt, anger, regret, tears.
But this time it is going to be different, God is going to carry me through this, I know he will. I know I can go to him, and He has sent me wonderful council.
But the pain is still there, and it won't go away for a while.

Emails from the B. Dad

Addi,
Guess what? I am alive and I have not been shipped off to some third world country……… And I so do miss you too! Well I better go love you bunches, Me
~
And that made my morning a little brighter.

Addi,
Guess what? I am alive and I have not been shipped off to some third world country......... And I so do miss you too! Well I better go love you bunches, Me

~

And that made my morning a little brighter.

I do realize that this picture has nothing to do with what I am about to write, but I will just have to live with that.
So many things are going through my head right now, I wish I could make them all stop and have peace for a moment. My heart hurts right now, for reasons I am having a hard time explaining. God is working in me and I can feel it, but right now the feelings I am harboring are frustrating. There are times in my life, (occurring more often as of late) that I want to be grown up. I cannot tell you how many people have told me not to wish that, to enjoy my childhood because it will go away quickly; but the thing is I am not enjoying my childhood. I am ready to grow up and start a life of my own.
My greatest want in life is to be married and have children, and I know God will grant me that in time because it is the desire of my heart, but the waiting part is getting to me. As much as I want to be grown up I know that I am not yet ready. I am not both emotionally ready nor am I mature enough. I still have some growing up to do, things to learn and experience.
I know that before I ever get married I need to learn to go to God first when I am feeling upset, scared, lonely, happy, angry, ect. I am learning that, but it takes time.
I wish I could jump ahead five years, away from all the immature drama that floods my life.
I wish I could just fast forward through this period and get to the light at the end of the tunnel.

Lord, please grant me patience, please.

I do realize that this picture has nothing to do with what I am about to write, but I will just have to live with that.Publish Post
So many things are going through my head right now, I wish I could make them all stop and have peace for a moment. My heart hurts right now, for reasons I am having a hard time explaining. God is working in me and I can feel it, but right now the feelings I am harboring are frustrating. There are times in my life, (occurring more often as of late) that I want to be grown up. I cannot tell you how many people have told me not to wish that, to enjoy my childhood because it will go away quickly; but the thing is I am not enjoying my childhood. I am ready to grow up and start a life of my own.
My greatest want in life is to be married and have children, and I know God will grant me that in time because it is the desire of my heart, but the waiting part is getting to me. As much as I want to be grown up I know that I am not yet ready. I am not both emotionally ready nor am I mature enough. I still have some growing up to do, things to learn and experience.
I know that before I ever get married I need to learn to go to God first when I am feeling upset, scared, lonely, happy, angry, ect. I am learning that, but it takes time.
I wish I could jump ahead five years, away from all the immature drama that floods my life.
I wish I could just fast forward through this period and get to the light at the end of the tunnel.

Lord, please grant me patience, please.

The Necessities of Life

The Necessities of Life

My prayer journal is filling up with a something, a something that has really been on my heart and mind. I feel foolish for it being there, written in my handwriting, on the paper. But it is there, and it is what I feel. Oh how I wish that this feeling would either bloom or just go away all together. Bah.

~

On a more random note....

After 257.40 cups of Starbucks Grande Caffe Latte, you'd be pushing up daisies

Take that as you please.

My prayer journal is filling up with a something, a something that has really been on my heart and mind. I feel foolish for it being there, written in my handwriting, on the paper. But it is there, and it is what I feel. Oh how I wish that this feeling would either bloom or just go away all together. Bah.
~
On a more random note….
After 257.40 cups of Starbucks Grande Caffe Latte, you’d be pushing up daisies
Take that as you please.

I spent most of my evening yesterday in the ER with an ear infection. It was bad, and the doctor was worse. It could tell you how bad it was, but I believe a conversation sums it up better.
Her: So how did it go last night?
Me: It was bad, the doctor was mean.
Her: How mean was He?
Me: Well lets just say that when he left the room, I gave him my angry eyes.
Her: Oh, thats bad.
~
GOD, the Master, The Holy of Israel,
has this solemn counsel:
“Your salvation requires you to turn back to me
and stop your silly efforts to save yourselves.
Your strength will come from settling down
in complete dependence on me–
The very thing
you’ve been unwilling to do.”
-Isaiah 30:15

I spent most of my evening yesterday in the ER with an ear infection. It was bad, and the doctor was worse. It could tell you how bad it was, but I believe a conversation sums it up better.

Her: So how did it go last night?

Me: It was bad, the doctor was mean.

Her: How mean was He?

Me: Well lets just say that when he left the room, I gave him my angry eyes.

Her: Oh, thats bad.

~
GOD, the Master, The Holy of Israel,
has this solemn counsel:
"Your salvation requires you to turn back to me
and stop your silly efforts to save yourselves.
Your strength will come from settling down
in complete dependence on me--
The very thing
you've been unwilling to do."
-Isaiah 30:15

My ABC's

A- is for Armenia, which makes me wiggle when I think about it.

B- is for Braums, which Amanda, Me, Justin, and Deea were going to go to tonight.

C- is for canceled. Justin canceled, and then Deea suddenly had a test to study for. It made me giggle at her.

D- is for donkey. In the Shakespeare poem I am reading for British Literature, they is a white donkey that I lovely lady sits upon.

E- is for email. I received a lovely email the other day that said:

"Addi I love you and I hope you live well and prosper."

I lovingly replied with:

"I heart you friend. And may the God of Wrath not pour out his bowl of eternal torment on you.
Have a good day!
Love, Addi"

F- is for fire. There was a terrible fire tonight across the street from the church.

G- is for Gas, the prices are going down.

H- helphaump. I think is how you spell it. I recieved a helphalump stuffed animal named Lumpy. He is cute and purple.

I- is for incomparable mercy and grace. His mercy and grace is like no other.

J- is for jammies. I have purple jammies on tonight that I only wear in the winter time.

K- is for K-Lake, our local radio station that I am in love with.

L- is for lip gloss. I must confess I am in love with it.

M- is for mad. I am mad that I cannot find my USB cord to upload pictures from my camera. (I believe that it accidentally got packed.)

N- is for narwhal. That is the only thing I can think of.

O- is for orange juice, which I am now craving.

P- is for passport, which I get in Janurary.

Q- is for Quaker Oatmeal, which I believe is on the menu for breakfast in the morning.

R- is for Rae, which is the middle name of the best friend.

S- is for sacrifice. God wanted me to sacrifice something, and it hurt a lot to do it.

T- is for talking with the Lord.

" I want you to sacrifice all of your secular music and let it go."
"But Lord, music is my life, it's one of my passions."
"Exactly, you put it in front of me."
"This is too hard for me, it is something I cannot do."
"Remember what I did for you?"

U- is for understanding what God is speaking to my heart.

V- is for vegabon, which is a word in an Elton John song I heard on the radio today.

W- is for water, the taste of our tap water is yucky.

X- it is extremely dangerous to do air guitar while jumping of the couch. Scars tend to happen.

Y- is for yesterday. Yesterday is a word that pops up in a lot of places. You can talk about what happened to you yesterday, Paul McCartney, and Hilary Duff can sing about yesterday, or you can refer to something as being 'so yesterday'. This requires a toss of the hand, and a strong valley girl accent. Lord help you if you ever say that in a sentence.

Z- is for Zeus. Which is a Greek god, which reminds me of the Greek alphabet, which reminds me of hurricane beta. Love how my mind works?

A- is for Armenia, which makes me wiggle when I think about it.
B- is for Braums, which Amanda, Me, Justin, and Deea were going to go to tonight.
C- is for canceled. Justin canceled, and then Deea suddenly had a test to study for. It made me giggle at her.
D- is for donkey. In the Shakespeare poem I am reading for British Literature, they is a white donkey that I lovely lady sits upon.
E- is for email. I received a lovely email the other day that said:
“Addi I love you and I hope you live well and prosper.”
I lovingly replied with:
“I heart you friend. And may the God of Wrath not pour out his bowl of eternal torment on you.
Have a good day!
Love, Addi“
F- is for fire. There was a terrible fire tonight across the street from the church.
G- is for Gas, the prices are going down.
H- helphaump. I think is how you spell it. I recieved a helphalump stuffed animal named Lumpy. He is cute and purple.

I- is for incomparable mercy and grace. His mercy and grace is like no other.
J- is for jammies. I have purple jammies on tonight that I only wear in the winter time.
K- is for K-Lake, our local radio station that I am in love with.
L- is for lip gloss. I must confess I am in love with it.
M- is for mad. I am mad that I cannot find my USB cord to upload pictures from my camera. (I believe that it accidentally got packed.)
N- is for narwhal. That is the only thing I can think of.
O- is for orange juice, which I am now craving.
P- is for passport, which I get in Janurary.
Q- is for Quaker Oatmeal, which I believe is on the menu for breakfast in the morning.
R- is for Rae, which is the middle name of the best friend.
S- is for sacrifice. God wanted me to sacrifice something, and it hurt a lot to do it.
T- is for talking with the Lord.
” I want you to sacrifice all of your secular music and let it go.”
“But Lord, music is my life, it’s one of my passions.”
“Exactly, you put it in front of me.”
“This is too hard for me, it is something I cannot do.”
“Remember what I did for you?”

U- is for understanding what God is speaking to my heart.
V- is for vegabon, which is a word in an Elton John song I heard on the radio today.
W- is for water, the taste of our tap water is yucky.
X- it is extremely dangerous to do air guitar while jumping of the couch. Scars tend to happen.
Y- is for yesterday. Yesterday is a word that pops up in a lot of places. You can talk about what happened to you yesterday, Paul McCartney, and Hilary Duff can sing about yesterday, or you can refer to something as being ’so yesterday’. This requires a toss of the hand, and a strong valley girl accent. Lord help you if you ever say that in a sentence.
Z- is for Zeus. Which is a Greek god, which reminds me of the Greek alphabet, which reminds me of hurricane beta. Love how my mind works?

“Your salvation requires you to turn back to Me and stop your silly efforts to save yourselves. Your strength will come from settling down-in complete dependence on Me.”
-Isaiah 30:15
~

But the waves are calling out my name
And they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times
I’ve tried before and failed
But the voice of truth tells me a different story
The voice of truth says, Do not be afraid
The voice of truth says, This is for My glory

~
Waves are calling out my name and laughing at me. It’s hard, I’m not going to lie. But this too shall pass.
It’s hard learning that you have faults and when others tell you this. But last night, they did not tell me this to hurt me, but they told me because they loved me. They told me things I needed to see.
Sometimes I am so ready to hear the words “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

"Your salvation requires you to turn back to Me and stop your silly efforts to save yourselves. Your strength will come from settling down-in complete dependence on Me."
-Isaiah 30:15

~

But the waves are calling out my name
And they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
But the voice of truth tells me a different story
The voice of truth says, Do not be afraid
The voice of truth says, This is for My glory

~

Waves are calling out my name and laughing at me. It's hard, I'm not going to lie. But this too shall pass.
It's hard learning that you have faults and when others tell you this. But last night, they did not tell me this to hurt me, but they told me because they loved me. They told me things I needed to see.
Sometimes I am so ready to hear the words "Well done, good and faithful servant."

I did this and I thought it was pretty interesting. I would recommend this neat little project to anyone. Have fun, I know I did.
Hurry though, because it does end soon.

I did this and I thought it was pretty interesting. I would recommend this neat little project to anyone. Have fun, I know I did.
Hurry though, because it does end soon.

Oh, I want this with a passion. It comes out Nov. 22nd. (He's so pretty.)
But alas, I have to money, because I cannot find a job, so watching this will have to do for now.

Oh, I want this with a passion. It comes out Nov. 22nd. (He’s so pretty.)
But alas, I have to money, because I cannot find a job, so watching this will have to do for now.

Edit:

I have a new about page, email me know if it doesn't show up.

End Edit:

In response to my sharing another one of my dreams, my mother quickly replies, "You better be careful about sharing your dreams, or your going to find your self in a hole, just like Joseph."

~
This past weekend I have spent in prayer. Today I gave my decision that I would love to go to Armenia. This excites me and terrifies me all at the same time. I am happy about this journey, and welcome it with open arms. But it is the fear of the unknown, the 'what-ifs' that are getting to me. I know God will provide, and take care of me. So I will be fine.
And, I get a stamp in my passport.

~
Love is invincible facing danger and death.
Passion laughs at the terrors of hell.
The fire of love stops at nothing--
it sweeps everything before it.
Flood waters can't drown love,
torrents of rain can't put it out.
Love can't be bought, love can't be sold--
it's not to be found in the marketplace.
-Song of Solomon 8:6-7

Edit:

I have a new about page, email me know if it doesn’t show up.

End Edit:

In response to my sharing another one of my dreams, my mother quickly replies, “You better be careful about sharing your dreams, or your going to find your self in a hole, just like Joseph.” ~
This past weekend I have spent in prayer. Today I gave my decision that I would love to go to Armenia. This excites me and terrifies me all at the same time. I am happy about this journey, and welcome it with open arms. But it is the fear of the unknown, the ‘what-ifs’ that are getting to me. I know God will provide, and take care of me. So I will be fine.
And, I get a stamp in my passport.
~
Love is invincible facing danger and death.
Passion laughs at the terrors of hell.
The fire of love stops at nothing–
it sweeps everything before it.
Flood waters can’t drown love,
torrents of rain can’t put it out.
Love can’t be bought, love can’t be sold–
it’s not to be found in the marketplace.
-Song of Solomon 8:6-7

God has opened a door that I had not thought would open.

He has answered my prayers and has given me a wonderful opportunity next October.

But who ever thought it would be Armenia?

I sure didn’t.

Prayers would be grateful.

God has opened a door that I had not thought would open.

He has answered my prayers and has given me a wonderful opportunity next October.

But who ever thought it would be Armenia?

I sure didn't.

Prayers would be grateful.

Last night I had a dream that my family and I went on vacation to Hawaii. We had a great time swimming with dolphins and the sea lions. (Remember, this is a dream.) In a spur of the moment decision, my father says he wants to go to Aruba the next morning, we all agree. So that night my family went to bed early. I decided to take a walk on the beach with my camera. Soon, I spot a surfer. As this surfer glided and spun across the water, he left a trail of brilliant glitter in the water. The colors were wonderful oranges, purples, and blues. Surprised by this I call out to the surfer. “Surfer, how are you making all of those colors?”
He simply responds, “This is what happens when you surf and smoke pot.”
~
How or where that cam from I have no idea, but I woke up this morning laughing to myself.

Last night I had a dream that my family and I went on vacation to Hawaii. We had a great time swimming with dolphins and the sea lions. (Remember, this is a dream.) In a spur of the moment decision, my father says he wants to go to Aruba the next morning, we all agree. So that night my family went to bed early. I decided to take a walk on the beach with my camera. Soon, I spot a surfer. As this surfer glided and spun across the water, he left a trail of brilliant glitter in the water. The colors were wonderful oranges, purples, and blues. Surprised by this I call out to the surfer. "Surfer, how are you making all of those colors?"
He simply responds, "This is what happens when you surf and smoke pot."

~
How or where that cam from I have no idea, but I woke up this morning laughing to myself.

I am slowly being drawn into the magic of a powerbook. I am truly thinking about switching.

I am slowly being drawn into the magic of a powerbook. I am truly thinking about switching.

1. It hurts to be lonely.
2. The Notebook is a horrible movie.
3. Message in A Bottle is even worse.
4. Kaylynn is a dear friend.
5. God meets me needs at the right time.
6. Time change is a good thing.
7. Fall weather make me want to write.
8. Garrett is a wonderful name for a boy.
9. I can make 20 trips into town on one tank of gas.
10. Breadsticks + a movie = a good way to spend an evening.
11. Calling my birthfather makes a road trip go by quicker for him.

So that’s all I have for now. My USB cord to upload pictures from my camera is MIA. Hopefully I shall find it soon.

Note: I do not think “learnings” is a word, but it seemed to fit in here perfectly.

Weekend Learnings:

1. It hurts to be lonely.
2. The Notebook is a horrible movie.
3. Message in A Bottle is even worse.
4. Kaylynn is a dear friend.
5. God meets me needs at the right time.
6. Time change is a good thing.
7. Fall weather make me want to write.
8. Garrett is a wonderful name for a boy.
9. I can make 20 trips into town on one tank of gas.
10. Breadsticks + a movie = a good way to spend an evening.
11. Calling my birthfather makes a road trip go by quicker for him.

So that's all I have for now. My USB cord to upload pictures from my camera is MIA. Hopefully I shall find it soon.

Note: I do not think "learnings" is a word, but it seemed to fit in here perfectly.

Addi
Female
Biblical
My witness, adorned, prey

I like that.

Addi
Female
Biblical
My witness, adorned, prey

I like that.

Yay for windy days, fall break, and curly hair.

More to come…

Yay for windy days, fall break, and curly hair.

More to come...

This has been one of the worst nights of my life. I had to betray one of my best friend’s trust, because I love her. Because I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to her.
My heart is broken.
God please heal my heart. And let me know your direction for my life.

This has been one of the worst nights of my life. I had to betray one of my best friend's trust, because I love her. Because I couldn't live with myself if something happened to her.
My heart is broken.

God please heal my heart. And let me know your direction for my life.

My earnest prayer now is instead of having a “mediocre grace, how bland the sound, that helped out a okay person like me, I once was off track, but then I got back on, had trouble seeing, but then I got contacts” moment, I pray that my heart and spirit will be changed to having an”amazing grace how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me, I once was lost but now am found, twas blind but now I see” moments.
I want to realize the dirtiness of my sin. Because then, I believe I would experience true repentance, and really appreciate what He did for me.
Does this make any sense?

My earnest prayer now is instead of having a "mediocre grace, how bland the sound, that helped out a okay person like me, I once was off track, but then I got back on, had trouble seeing, but then I got contacts" moment, I pray that my heart and spirit will be changed to having an"amazing grace how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me, I once was lost but now am found, twas blind but now I see" moments.
I want to realize the dirtiness of my sin. Because then, I believe I would experience true repentance, and really appreciate what He did for me.

Does this make any sense?

Ginger

Our campus cow who gets out at the strangest times. No one knows how she gets out or where. I lovingly refer to her as "moodini"

I got to talk with my birthfather on the phone tonight.

That made me happy.

I told him I loved him for the first time.

That made me happier.

I have a little shadow that goes in and out of me....

The day was cool, with a hint of fall in the air. It was also quite windy, so when I went for a walk, the wind made my skirt dance.

I am excited that the fall weather snuck upon me. It was one of the pleasant surprises I received today.

He changes times and seasons;he sets up kings and deposes them. He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the discerning.

-Daniel 2:21

 

The day was cool, with a hint of fall in the air. It was also quite windy, so when I went for a walk, the wind made my skirt dance.
I am excited that the fall weather snuck upon me. It was one of the pleasant surprises I received today.

He changes times and seasons;he sets up kings and deposes them. He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the discerning.

-Daniel 2:21

It's not good when one of your best friends says opps while coloring your hair...

Friendships are hard little suckers to maintain. I think that should be needlepointed on a pillow.

While on my jog tonight I let a lot of my frustration out about some things that are going on in my life. God also showed me a few places where I am lacking and am at fault.

Lately when problems arise I tend to get scared, shut down, and wish I was back home in the city. But that in itself it useless, because I never really want to go back to my life in the city, I just want to go back to the security that I had there.
Over the past four months God has thrown me into situation after situation that was way out of my comfort zone. I had been praying that I would be placed out of my comfort zone someday, but I never knew how much I would dislike it, or how hard it would be. I remember laying many a night, these past few months, crying because I thought I was all alone here, with no friendships in sight. But once again, I did not put my trust in God that He would provide and take care of me. Now, more than ever I can honestly say that I am happy where I am. Now granted I know there will probably be many more tears in my future, but for now I am fine with being able to say I am happy. Because I never thought I would.

Friendships

Friendships are hard little suckers to maintain. I think that should be needlepointed on a pillow.
While on my jog tonight I let a lot of my frustration out about some things that are going on in my life. God also showed me a few places where I am lacking and am at fault.

Lately when problems arise I tend to get scared, shut down, and wish I was back home in the city. But that in itself it useless, because I never really want to go back to my life in the city, I just want to go back to the security that I had there.
Over the past four months God has thrown me into situation after situation that was way out of my comfort zone. I had been praying that I would be placed out of my comfort zone someday, but I never knew how much I would dislike it, or how hard it would be. I remember laying many a night, these past few months, crying because I thought I was all alone here, with no friendships in sight. But once again, I did not put my trust in God that He would provide and take care of me. Now, more than ever I can honestly say that I am happy where I am. Now granted I know there will probably be many more tears in my future, but for now I am fine with being able to say I am happy. Because I never thought I would.

Romanced by the Twilight

Many a time I was asked why I was sitting there, if I required any assistance. I would smile and kindly shake my head, for I myself did not even know what I needed. The years of schooling in London had not prepared me for what I had experienced here. The air was intoxicating, a scent that stirred deep within me. Watching others pass by became my hobby at this time of day. The sun, as it had just begun its descent behind the purple peaked mountains, created a display of magnificent colors that ranged from the pinks to the light blues and yellows. This was better than anything I had experienced in the cafes of Paris, or on the shores of Spain. There was just something about this place that held my attention and would not let go. I then realized I was being romanced by the twilight.