Saturday, February 2, 2008

The attacks by the evil one are getting old?..really, really old. But I know that I am doing to right thing?..but it just seems like attack after attack are coming my way. I hate that this anger has such a hold on me. I know I need to forgive him, but I am just not there yet. He fought dirty, hit below the belt; but the worse thing was, it was personal, very personal. I realize that I have to respect him, although he is no authority in my life by any means, but, he is my parent?s boss. This anger that has a hold in me is fierce, and gives him more control, but still. Several times I have prayed about it and I keep getting the same answer, ?My love, pray for him.? No Lord, no, I can?t, won?t, don?t want to. This is yet another attack from the evil one, and it hurts. Lord, please help me not crumble, because I am near the breaking point.

I?m home this weekend. Rush is a week from Monday and I am in charge of everything involved. Stressed out? Yes. Does it cause sleepless nights because one?s head is full of things that need to be done? You bet. But I have made it this far and only have a week to go. I am proud of myself. This was a daunting task that required organization, planning, dictating, meetings, and so much more. Last night mom helped me with the Rush posters because I am so not artistically creative. (Its not my fault though, I?ve been told its genetic.) Overall I am happy with the way they turned out. This morning I took some pictures, so, ignore my ?just crawled out of bed? look. :)

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    I met my partner for this summer in Scotland via facebook. She is a junior and has been once before. She was able to answer my million and a half questions that I had and I was so thankful. We have the same birthday which is pretty cool too. She sent me so much information about the culture, people, everything. I am about to sit down and print it all out. Seeing it all on paper makes it much more real and makes me much more nervous. But, its a good nervous, an excited one. :)
   Also, I had to say goodbye to all things caffeine, antihistamines, and cough syrup.  Oh. my. goodness. I never thought that the loss of caffeine was going to be so hard. I was so tired yesterday I was dragging. It?s sad how a legal stimulant can cause your body to have such an addiction. Stupid heart. :)

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