My Lovely Genesis

Oh my goodness mom, it is only 12 and God has already been teaching me so much today!! I have been reading that book April got me for my birthday. While reading it God completely knocked me off of my feet. You have to read to whole book to truly understand it, to enjoy it. But here is what I have been learning.

“Reading George Mc Donald, several years ago I cam across an astounding thought. “There is in every human heart a pla
ce that only God can fill.” But what the old poet was saying was that there is also a chamber in God himself, into which none can enter but the one, the individual” You were meant to fill a place in the heart of God no one and nothing else can fill. You are the one that overwhelms his heart with just “one glance of your eyes” (Song. 4:9b) You are the one who takes his breath away by your beautiful heart that, against all odds, hopes in him. Let that be true of you.
God wants to live this life together with you, to share in your days, decisions, disappointments, happiness, and heartache. He wants to pour his love into your heart and longs to have your pour your into his. He wants intimace with the real you.
Here’s how the flow goes in Hosea. First God says that he will thwart our efforts to find a life apart from him.

“Therefore I will block her path with thornbushes;
I will wall her in so that she cannot find her way.
She will chase after her lovers but not catch them;
she will look for them but not find them.”

He does this in order to wear us out, get us to turn back to him in thirsty longing. Then he begins to woo us. He often takes us aside from every other source of comfort so that he alone can have our heart’s attention.

There for I am going to allue her;
I will lead her into the desert and speak
tenderly to her there. (Hos. 2:14)”

There it is. I do believe that is the complete reason why I have been experiencing my lack of friendships. “He often takes us aside from every other source of comfort”. You know how I hate silence, how I am terrified of being alone. I have been filling the place that only God can fill with earthly relationships, thinking that they would satisfy my needs. He has taken me completely out of my comfort zone, to a place where I have nothing to hold onto for comfort. He wants me, all of me. I have been to afraid to do that. Do you think I am completely off here? I dont’ think I am.
It goes on to say how in the Bible Jesus calls himself the bridegroom, and the lover of our soul. I need to let him captivate my heart, before anyone else does. I need to delight myself in the Lord, and he will then give me the desires of my heart!! Sorry, I am just really excited right now. I love learning. YOU SO HAVE TO READ THIS BOOK. You know, this kinda ties into my not wanting to date thing too. But that is another email.