Jesus, I don't understand your ways. But I have chosen to turn the other cheek, please don't let that choice backfire. I'm following you, and that is why this is happening.

WOOOOOOAAAAH.

Back in the day?? I think so.









Geeze, we thought we were so cool. :)

.....actually, now that I think of it....not that much has changed.

I love my life.


And, I am so thankful that I have kept this blog for all these years.

When I finally get five minutes of free time, I spend it doing stupid crap like this:


I guess its okay though, midterm grades are about to be posted and I will have all A's and B's. Go me. :)

Highlights of the week:

The beautiful sunset view from my spot in the library.


The smell of sharpened pencils at work.

Spending the evening reading Othello, my new favorite play.

Happy Monday

Before:



After:

Woo hoo for new haircuts.
:)

Lord,

Please teach me the patience of love.

Love,
Me

I want a love like Anne and Gilbert.

The End.

:)

not for the faint of heart....

My parents had an idea that it was back. Well, it might be something new, we are not for sure. A girl had mentioned she had seen it at night, and gave a horrifyingly graphic description of it. It breaks my heart that she saw it, she is far too young to experience such evil. In the past, our apartment has been protected. It stayed in the cottage and never crossed the boundary into our apartment.
That was until this past week.
Eli confided to me that he has been having nightmares, is hearing voices at night, and feels like someone is watching him. The first night I came home, we both had terrifying nightmares and have been sleeping together since then. Then tonight, I finally saw it.
I don't know what my readers think about the dark forces that are in this world. I personally believe that satan is very real and has a very powerful hold on this world. I believe in demons, and believe that they cannot harm a Christian, but they can do damage around them. We have had a demon in our cottage before. Sometimes it comes in with a new girl. Sometimes it comes in when a girl is making unwise choices. The latter is occurring presently.
The youngest girl in our cottage was finishing the second Anne of Green Gables movie. It was her first time to watch it so I offered to stay up with her to finish it, so she could sleep peacefully knowing that Anne and Gilbert truly loved each other. I was writing in my commonplace journal when I saw it drift by. It didn't threaten me or try to bother me. It simply made its presence known. It never came close either, it stayed on the other side of the room. When I saw it I was surprised, because I did not have any fear. I knew exactly what it was, but felt a sense of protection. I have a feeling that I was being guarded by angels and that is why it kept its distance. After I saw it I finished writing the sentence I started in my journal and calmly gathered my things and went to bed. I woke my mom up and let her know what happened. So her and my dad are going to pray and anoint the house with oil tomorrow.
It's crazy to think that the evil one has such power in this world. I mean, I knew he did, but he never directly interacted with me like that before. The Bible says I have should no fear of the terrors of the night, and I'm not. I know that I am loved and adored by my King. Since I am His child I have the power and authority to banish the evil one.
Eli and I are sleeping in my room tonight. I feel very confident that my room is protected, so until things die down we are sleeping in here. God is all powerful and will keep us safe, of this I am sure.

But, I am SO not walking around the cottage by myself anytime soon. :)

happiness

He makes my days so much brighter.
I can't wait to be a mom. :)

I made my blog and twitter updates private.
My two "best friends" and I ended up in the mother of all fights. No joke. It ended when I handed my mom the phone because I was so tired of their hateful texts.
It was terrible. I haven't been called names like that in a long time. It was so bad that I am truly considering transferring away from that awful place. I've had so much drama there, its ridiculous. After it was all over I was mad. I feel like a freak that I have had such ridiculous relationships in my life. I feel like something is wrong with me that I can't keep friends. I so want a clean slate to start over on. I want to be someone new that no one knows.

I don't want them creeping on my blog and twitter looking for ammunition. I'm their new enemy. They actually told me that too. So until things die down only the people I know, love, and trust and allowed to read my thoughts.

Geeze, I so want away from this place.

Lord, can I please have a fresh start somewhere new??

I've had so much drama at OBU these past three years, I'm sick of it. 

This can't possibly be where you want me. Life is miserable there. 

Love,

Me

texting

Be still my heart.

Boy, you are SO worthy. :)

God, I'm starting to lose hope.


What do I do?

I give up.

I deleted my facebook and twitter.

For right now, I need to be away from all the influences around me that are not good.

God is breaking me and molding me into something new.

He is stripping me of people I hold dear. It hurts so bad, but I know it is for the best. They are not the best influences for me, and I saw it coming. I tried to fight it, but in the end I knew I had no choice.

I will still have my blog/flickr page.

For now I am hoping and praying that God will work my future out.

For He brings peace that is not of this world.

If you need me, I still have my email address. And you can text me if you have my number.

[addison dot eaton at gmail dot com]

And the award for "Worst Week" goes to....

Me, hands down. I so win.

My heart is heavy. I still cannot believe it all happened that fast. I feel like a piece of my heart has been ripped out of my chest and sold to some black market organ business. A 5 year friend ship down the drain because I was supposedly talking about her. People, I was no involved. I could not have been less involved. My mouth was shut the entire time and yet I came out the bad guy, and lost a best friend. I guess I should not be too sad. I mean, I losing a person that removed me as her friend from myspace/facebook instead of talking to me. Hello, middle school called and they want their drama back.
But still, I was the hypocritical one, the fake one, the one causing all the drama. Gah. I still don't get it. Maybe she was just looking for an excuse to end it?
Regardless, it still ended. We signed the divorce papers and I picked up all my stuff from her house. Everything she had borrowed I took back. Even the condoms I let her have. Ha. Yes. I took those bad boys back. As ridiculous as it sounds, I didn't want to be the one giving her an incentive to go sleep around. But after it was all said and done, I'm still sad. I miss her.
I'm still angry. Very, very, very angry. I know if I let go of my anger that means I am going to have to begin to forgive her. Heck, I SO don't want to go there. This is going to be a hard thing to forgive. God still loves her. I need to too.
At least the worst of it is over. I'm now spending the weekend resting and enjoying the peace. I need peace.

You know....maybe God allowed this to happen to bring me closer to Him.

I exist.

A man said to the universe:
"Sir I exist!"
"However," replied the universe,
"The fact has not created in me
A sense of obligation."

 --Stephen Crane

In other news, I found this blog. This girl is so hardcore.
When I become a mom, this is who I want to be. 

Hurt.
Betrayed.
5 years down the drain.
Used.
Abused.
Wasted.

I need sleep so I can get up and study. But all I can do is lay in bed and think about what happened. I'm angry and hurt. Then I start to cry. She's not worth my tears. Especially if she is going to throw away our friendship over a rumor that isn't even true.

I need sleep.

And a vacation.

A very loooooong vacation.

Birthday Dress Potentials

Option #3


I think this may be our winner. :) We shall see.

Birthday Dress Potentials

Here are some candidates:


Macy's -Suzi Chen


Macy's -Donna Morgan

Birthday Dress

I'm on the hunt for the perfect dress.

It has to be:
-pretty
-have silk/lace
-elegant
-knee length

This isn't going to be just dress. It is going to be my birthday dress. I've made a promise to myself that I am NOT going to be fat and 21. That's just not going to happen. I've been looking farward to turning 21 for years now. I honestly have no idea what I will be doing that night, but whatever it is I WILL be wearing my birthday dress. :)

As soon as I find the dress I will post it. :) Keep your eyes peeled as well. I'm currently taking applications for dress hunters. If you find anything beautiful, email me the link.